In January of 2010, I was about 3 months pregnant when Jory got a call. It was the deployment call saying that he would be deploying in May for 13 months. I always wondered what I would do in that situation, and now I knew. I didn’t do anything. I was sort of in the mindset of “well, this will happen with a military family…” It took me a few hours for it to sink in and after that, I was a hot mess. We decided that I would go down to Florida with my parents for the year.
We spent the next few months preparing for the deployment. It was mostly difficult because Jory had SO MANY SCHOOLS that they sent him to. It wasn’t too bad, but annoying to say the least. He left that May. I was about 7 months pregnant standing there watching the plane fly away until I couldn’t see it anymore. A bittersweet day. I was so ready for him to leave so we could get this thing done and over with, but I was also not happy that he was leaving and he was going to miss the birth of our daughter.
I went down to Florida for 4 months. I had Kiyana in July, but he wasn’t allowed to come home because we weren’t married yet at that time. I moved back to South Dakota when Kiyana was about 2 months old. I came back so I could work for Jory’s business and go to school, and to just be generally prepared and settled in when Jory got home. While Jory was deployed, he applied for his job at the CIO, and did a phone interview. He did get the job, so I knew we were moving to Rapid when he got home.
When Kiyana was about 2.5 months old, Jory got his R&R. He FINALLY got to meet our sweet baby girl! I also got to see Dominic for the first time since I had come home. It was an awesome two weeks. We were a family together for the first time. It was pretty magical if I do say so myself. When he left to go back, I think I had a harder time than I did when he left the first time. The first time, I had months with him to absorb the fact that he was leaving. During R&R, I was stuck on the fact that my boyfriend was HOME and I got to see him. I didn’t want to think about him leaving again.
Once he left, life got more “normal”…. I was working, going to school, etc. We had a routine. The rest of 2010 was pretty boring.
It all started in 2008. Jory and I were in Ft. Gordon, GA for AIT with the Army. He had just separated from Dominic’s mom, and we were in the same class. I really didn’t notice him at first. After awhile, our friend circles connected and westarted hanging out. In April 2009, we decided to begin a relationship together. It was pretty fabulous.
Once we left AIT, we went our separate ways. He went back to South Dakota, and I to Ohio. About a week later, Jory called and said he missed me and wanted to see me. What does he do? Oh, the usual thing. He packed a back, got in his car, and drove halfway across the country to see me. We spent a week in Ohio exploring, I showed him all the places I loved growing up, introduced him to Cedar Point, and so on.
At the end of that week, about 45 minutes before he was supposed to leave, he asked me if I wanted to come back with him. Within 45 minutes, we had all of my stuff packed into his tiny Mustang anod we were South Dakota bound. Oh man, what a long drive. On the way, Jory tells me he lives in the third biggest city in South Dakota. okay, sweet. Here I am picturing something the size of Toledo. Nope. It was a tiny town smaller than Fremont, where I grew up.
A few days later, I met his newly 2 yr old son, Dominic. He was sweet and adorable! We celebrated his birthday and I got to know him. We didn’t have him much in the beginning because the custody had not been arranged yet. We saw him whenever his mom felt like it.
That October, we got ourselves an apartment. It was pretty amazing for an apartment! We got everything set up and we were so happy to be on our own. I never thought it would happen! We went to court for Dominic and we were granted joint physical and legal custody of Dominic with an order to pay child support. That November, we found out we were pregnant with Kiyana. I was terrified but Jory was ecstatic! (Here we are now, I’m definitely not terrified now. I LOVE being a mom now!)
There is our love story. It’s pretty amazing.
2010 to come soon.
Well, it’s a blog. A blog for me to share our journey through the trials and tribulations of parenting. Lots about parenting. Parenting two kids in South Dakota. Parenting two kids while running a daycare. Parenting a child with behavioral issues. Parenting an irrefutably independent 3 year old. Parenting a homeschooled child.
I want to be able to share what we are going through and maybe give someone some hope in a similar situation. Or maybe give someone some insight into our lives. Maybe even showing someone that there ARE other parents with the same beliefs. Even in this very authoritative and traditional state.
So what about us?
Well, there are four of us. Jory, Samantha, Dominic, and Kiyana.
Jory is the wonderful dad and husband of the family. He listens to me babble on about all of the research I do in regards to our kids and basically anything else in our life. He is my backbone and seriously the most loving and supportive man ever. He also brought Dominic into my life which has been amazing, even if he is very trying some days.
Samantha, that’s me. I’m a work at home mom and since coming home, it’s been the most uplifting decision I’ve made in a long time. I run an in home daycare so that I can provide my kids with the care that they need, and I can offer the same to other parents. We have had HORRIBLE experiences with daycare and I decided if others aren’t gonna treat my kids right, I’ll just do it myself. So here we are.
Dominic is 6 (will be 7 soon!) At a young age, we knew something wasn’t quite “right” with Dominic. I was SO sure that he had ODD (Oppositional Defiance Disorder)… From day one in school, he had problems. Not your normal age appropriate problems or reactions. This year, we changed his schools. Same issues, only more amplified. In September, Dominic was placed on a mental hold at the local hospital. It was supposed to last 72 hrs, but ended up lasting 5 days. At the end of it all, he was diagnosed with ODD and DMDD. It’s a process. We are dealing with it day by day and trying to help him cope with his issues in daily life. Overall, he is a great kid as far as home life goes. We’re here to help him grow to be a well rounded, well adjusted adult.
Kiyana is 3. She is amazing! She is such a fabulous child. She has an attitude sometimes but we’re working through that. she is EXTREMELY independent and stubborn (much like myself.) One of our main problems with prior care providers was that they didn’t like such an independent child. They tended to view it as being defiant. That is not the case. I refuse to raise her to be a submissive person, that’s not the type of adult I want her to be.
I will elaborate more on specific situations as we go.